Infrequently Asked Questions

Our seriously funny, or humorously serious, answers to questions about Noodle Talk that most people are too embarrassed to ask.

What kind of questions are these anyway? Will I be forced to reveal my deepest, darkest secrets like the crush I still have for the librarian who was in my elementary school?

Noodle Talk questions cover the full gamut of inner and outer personal experience — everything from dust balls to metaphorical and metaphysical musings. (Some may argue this isn’t much of a range.) And no, you don’t lose any points or undergo social banishment if you prefer not to answer a particular question. Just return the strip to the bag without reading the question aloud. You can then find another that’s more to your liking. (For sample questions, please see our “Sample Stirrers” page.)

Can the Mountain View Collection be used in Florida? Is the Turnpike Collection only available in New Jersey?

Each set can be used anywhere in the world. They include entirely different questions but offer exactly the same experience: a chance to effortlessly bond with others as we share the truth of our individual lives. The only reason to choose one instead of the other is if you have a name or color preference (light blue for the Mountain View Collection, pale yellow/green for the Turnpike Collection).

Do you have a collection that has only questions about deep-sea fishing? I think Noodle Talk would be a neat way to avoid getting seasick once we hoist anchor.

Great idea! Unlike most of our competitors though we do not offer collections with specialized themes. We believe that relationships are enriched by sharing the totality of who we are, and that we gain more by not limiting conversations to a narrow set of predetermined topics. Much of Noodle Talk’s charm, in fact, lies in the total unpredictability and range of its subject matter: A seemingly mundane, innocuous-sounding question will often evoke the most endearing answer and insights.

My three-year-old daughter never stops asking questions like, “Why not?” and “Are we there yet?” Can she play Noodle Talk?

Noodle Talk is designed primarily for adults and older teens but youngsters love to join in as well. Although children frequently lack the vocabulary or life experiences associated with certain questions, adults can use these moments as teaching opportunities rather than exclusionary ones. All questions, with the possible exception of one, are rated “G” for general audiences to encourage family use. The only one that comes close to the line is: “How did you first learn about human reproduction or responsible sexual behavior? (Or have you yet?)”

Noodle Talk sounds like a game. Is there any secret strategy or training I can avail myself of to increase my chances of winning?

Many of our customers refer to Noodle Talk as a game because of its playful elements and the suspense involved in anticipating the next question — especially yours! Unlike a game however, there is no winning, losing, competition, strategizing, scoring, or particular skill that’s needed. Our “rules” are simply guidelines for getting the most out of Noodle Talk but many customers do fine by completely ignoring them.

Isn’t Noodle Talk really therapy?

We tried getting it covered by health insurance but were informed that “life” is considered a pre-existing condition. Underwriters also determined that Noodle Talk is too easy, inexpensive, angst-free, and entertaining to qualify as a mental health treatment. Finally, no professional training or license is required to practice Noodle Talk. According to authorities then, the answer is “no.”

What if I buy a set only to discover that no one wants to talk a noodle with me? Or that I’m just not a Noodle-Talk-type person? What is your return or exchange policy?

Gee, what a bummer. Noodle Talkers we find are really special people — the best in the whole wide world. While we don’t think that having your money refunded will do much to solve the underlying issues, we’d be happy to do so. All we ask is that you contact us to explain the problem and help us find the best solution. We may request that you return your purchase postage paid before a refund is issued, or — in cases involving replacement for damage — send us a photo showing why we erred in not using a shipping container for your original order. If you have any doubts that Noodle Talk is what you’re looking for, please call us before placing an order to discuss your concerns.

I consider myself a brilliant conversationalist. Why do I need Noodle Talk?

Maybe so others can get a word in edgewise? (Just kidding.) The truth is, no one actually needs Noodle Talk: Human beings have managed to exist for thousands of years without it — though perhaps the world would be far different today if Noodle Talk was spoken in earlier times. Take, for example, the People’s Republic of Humanistan, whose citizens schmooze about life itself by sharing their authentic stories. Their native tongue (aka Noodle Talk) ensures that only one person speaks at a time and that no one dominates a conversation; everyone has something interesting to say, much of it quite memorable. Most importantly, this unique form of Humanistanian social discourse has been linked to higher levels of PLQ (Personal Lovability Quotient) in individuals. What’s not to like?

Did Marcel Proust, the French novelist, play Noodle Talk?

Not likely since the inspiration for Noodle Talk’s first edition came in 1992, long after his death. You may be confusing it with the “Proust Questionnaire,” Vanity Fair’s monthly celebrity interview named in his honor. It features questions about life drawn from a popular 19th century French parlor game that Proust answered not once but thrice. Noodle Talk is proud of its distinguished literary pedigree, which we only discovered in 2009. We happen to think that our questions are far more expansive and fun but that’s another story altogether.

Can I stir my coffee or favorite beverage with Noodle Talk?

Only if you enjoy seeing — and swallowing — soggy bits of paper floating in your mug or glass.

Can Noodle Talk be used outside the home?

So glad you asked — we were afraid we’d never have the chance to describe all the great places where Noodle Talk shows up — e.g., in workplaces for team building and staff development; in schools for journaling, creative writing assignments, ESL instruction, literacy training, and guidance counseling; in therapeutic settings such as hospitals, group homes, and mental health facilities; at weddings and other celebrations where guests gather to honor loved ones — in short, wherever people value the power of story and true connection. Please don’t hesitate to contact us for information about these and other applications.